I wish I could say Ann did it, but unfortunately I’ve created two Star Wars Beasts and I’ve no idea how to slow down their growth!  Josh and Audrey are so obsessed with Star Wars that it is the only thing they think about 24x7.  Okay, maybe Audrey is 20x7, but Josh is definitely 24x7.  You can see evidence of this in this video.

If Josh is the one initiating a conversation (i.e. he’s not answering a direct question from us) it always starts like this, “I was wondering…”  At this point, I tune out and wait to answer “The Force.”.  Every day I get about 10 of these statements…remember I work out of the home, so I only see the kids about 3-4 hours a day, so ten different Star Wars conversations in that time span are tiring.  Here are a few examples, bear in mind these are just random thoughts from Josh at random times.

Upon being woken up, while going to the bathroom, “I’ve been wondering, you know when Luke throws the bomb into the AT-AT and then falls all the way down?  How come he didn’t get hurt?”  Me: “The Force.”

After getting in car after hockey practice, “I’ve been wondering, how come Yoda is so small and he’s like fifty hundred years old?” Me: “The Force.”

After being asked about his play date from Dad and what he learned at preschool…as soon as it was his turn to initiate, “I’ve been wondering, since Darth Vader is Luke’s Dad, why does he burn him up at the end of Star Wars 6?” Me: “The Force.”

Finally, playing up Josh’s new ‘rebel’ attitude regarding speeding in the car (especially when we are late for hockey practice), “Dad, put the pedal to the metal and I’ll watch out for cops!” (ponders for a moment) “I’ve been wondering…if we could go hyper-speed, how fast would we be going?” Me: “The Force.” Josh: “Huh?”

As you can see, the constant Star Wars bombardment from Josh and Audrey has taken its toll on me.  They’ve employed the ‘Jedi Mind Trick’ with such efficiency that they’ve even changed Mom’s opinion of Star Wars and she’s now a fan.  It’s either the Jedi Mind Trick or the brainwashing resulting from the constant humming of this all day.  The end result…Ann now likes Star Wars and now she even hums this throughout the day to Lucas…see I told you Anakin Aney had a special ring to it!

Considering that we are half way through March and a few days ago we got another 5” of snow (albeit most of it is melted now) I think I still can!  While you are reading, if any of you can think of a reason why I still live in Minnesota, please comment…Florida or Arizona sound so much better each year! 

I never got any Christmas videos or stories up, so I thought I better get at least one humorous story down in writing for Josh and Audrey to enjoy when they grow up…along with a little video evidence.  Don’t worry, I will not bore you with too much Christmas morning footage, but I have to present one video as Exhibit A in the case of “Dad versus Kids”.  Dad is charging Josh and Audrey with the crime of “Christmas Morning Liars” and I think my evidence will speak for itself.... [More]

Today, we had a PJ day as all three kids are suffering from awful colds. Audrey’s poor nose wouldn’t stop running. She even requested to wear sunglasses around the house because her eyes were so sensitive to the light. I must have wiped her nose over 30 times. Josh laid on the couch pretty much all day cuddling with his big warm blanket off his bed – he is usually the most hot-blooded kid. And, Luke’s cry was a little softer than usual from his hoarse voice. To say the least, everyone was feeling pretty yucky, including myself with a sore throat. We watched several movies, including Star Wars I, The Grinch, and Over the Hedge. In the afternoon, the delivery man came to the door with a package from Grandpa and Grandma which totally brightened the kids’ spirits. As soon as they saw my Mom’s famous cookie tin, Audrey smiled and said “Dama sent us tookies!” And, Frosty the Snowman cutouts taboot. Thanks Mom and Dad for the Thanksgiving Care package – it totally made our day!

Anyone who knows us, knows that coffee has no role in our lives.  So it is ironic that our website has a coffee theme and Aud's nickname is coffee based.  But it was mere coincidence.  "Coffee Bean" has three syllables as does "Audrey Jean", so with my limited rhyming skill, that is what I called her one day and it stuck.  As for the website, I chose the theme because it was the most soothing, soft theme in the web blogging framework that I use (along with being a color palette that I generally like).  Anyway, I haven't even started the post and I've digressed.

With the upcoming birth of our new son, I found it prudent to finally get down a few of the stories/topics about Audrey that I wanted to blog about but just never got around to it.  By the way, THANK GOD the new baby is a boy, as this post will point out (no offense to my women readers).... [More]

I don't believe it.  If you haven't read Click! yet, you might want to browse it for a preview of the insanity about to unfold.  The night in question was almost an identical set up.  Ann was going out for a night with adults for a little hiatus from the kids which she more than deserves and never does enough of.  I was all alone with the kids for the night.  No big deal of course.  However after reading Click! and the following story, you will be asking yourself why Ann ever leaves me alone with the kids.... [More]